My 9th Sem (Post Graduation)

Hey everyone

Post Vhee.Z(J)hay.Tea.aaI, life has been a big transition for me. I worked with a BPO for like 2 months; earned a decent enough booty, spent it as well and then joined my organization here in Pune alongwith K2. We share an apartment and are on our own. Trust me, living on your own makes oneself completely different individual altogether..(Posts on that coming up soon..) Anyways, as I had mentioned in the earlier post about my ultra-awesome,outta this world training, here’s a peep into the realm of idiocy. I call it – My 9th Sem (Post Graduation).

Well, it all started on the 26th Oct 2009—my first day as a trainee. And from that day till today I am supposedly being trained on various technologies and lord knows what all crap. However, the training room scene is totally different than what is perceived from the outside. We’ve done everything that is like a BIG NO –NO in the training centre. Right from watching movies to playing LAN games—we’ve done it all. We’ve even managed to beat the n/w admins ass and get internet access to all the restricted domains as well. And what to say about the trainers! We’ve booed them, called them names and some have even slept under their nose. But one thing that is so strikingly evident in all of them is their English vocab and grammar which I so feel is encumbered by their mother tongue –(Marathi). Following are the few masterpieces that my colleague P managed to capture over the period of a month or somethhng.(I surmise he just gave up after that..!!) Enjoy..!!


1. Example made Kapil Sabil to run into the Ministry Dept.
2. Your geometry has to be closed.
3. Today’s scenarios is something, it is not something.
4. I have the quality of a product…(You bet..!!!)
5. He installed the s/w on 100s of installations.
6. The cost varies from high to very high kind of thing.
7. The bottom line is this graph i.e economics..(WTF..!!!)
8. Concept comes in some professors concept..(….?????....)
9. You are saying, everytime we are talking..(What on the earth did he mean by
this…)
10.Next is what is here..
11.Instead of going to Kulu Manali, you can start planning to go to Kulu Manali.
12.Answer is . this is idiot. (I bet you are one..)
13.You have to take care of language kind of thing.
14.Last bench..? (Some guy in the middle row answers)Trainer rebuffs-- You are not
last bench..!!!
15.Obviously you are now freezed.
16.Developers are smarty kind of thing.
17.Send it to the pending.
18.9/11 happened in you know the twin towers..
19.(While citing an ex of protocol) Next Monday,i’l find all of you are in a tie.
20.Yes..(pasues) No..(pasues some more).. talking.
21.Sachin Deshpande didn’t come means there is some runtime exception.
22.Suppose my name is Kedar..(He actually was Kedar K)
23.Create function to search Employee. IF employee not searched, throw an exception.
24.You are divided between client and server.
25.This is a part of your head.( is tag used in html)
26.If you want that status bar disply..ahh.. hmm change mozilla firefox display..!
27.I am going to consume your time.
28.Have a patience.. In a 3 days its difficult to understand me..(gimme 3 million
years and stil I wont be able to..)


Here are a few dirty ones..
1.I am just touching your basics.
2.I am just feeling the heap (pronounced as ‘hip’) area. Everyone feel the heap
area.

El Classico
1.Trainer to one of the students—“Yes-please”.. whats your name?
Student—Sir, Maninder.. Sir..
Trainer (after thinking for sometime) –“Yes-please”… Don’t talk..!!
2.(While we were watching soe movie in the last bay)—Last row is one row..!!!(We
figured out later it was “Last row make one row”).


Cheers

Lalit

P.S: The fanbulastic English vocab and the accent reminds me of my college profs and staff. Hence the name to the post.